What Kind of Faith Can I Have? (09/21/2014)

I've had reason to do some reflecting, uncomfortably so, on faith.

Joseph Smith said in the Discourses on Faith that we can only really have faith if we have had it revealed to us that our actions are in accordance with the Lord's will. (I'll find the exact reference and quote and insert it later.) I experienced that in building my house. I know with no doubts that the Lord told me to build the house. There were a lot of huge obstacles that happened during the process. But, because I know the Lord told me to build it, rather me just deciding to build it, I had absolute faith that he had a pathway prepared to overcome every obstacle, whether it were weather, workforce, accidents, financial lack, or timing. In every one of those cases, I had absolute faith and no doubts that the obstacle would not have any detrimental effects and would be overcome.

So now I come upon an obstacle in a project, and I am unsure how it will be resolved. However, this time I do not have that absolute faith. The project is a good one, but we decided we wanted to do it. I do not have that absolute assurance that it is in harmony with the Lord's will. So, I do not know if it there be a smooth resolution, nor if the resolution will let me finish my project. How do I have faith now?

Since I cannot have the pure faith based upon knowing I'm doing the Lord's will, I must have another level of faith. I need to define it so I can anchor myself in it.

The possible options:
The a. whose project/action and b. what the result will be:
1.a. The Lord's plan 1.b. The project will be finished
2.a. My plan 2.a. The project will be finished
3.a. My plan 3.b. The project will not be finished

For the 1. row, faith is easy. For the 2. row, I can have faith if I have been told that is the column I am in and that the Lord sanctions my plan. If I am unsure whether I am in row 2 or 3, how do I have faith?

I know of instances where good people are doing worthy things and it doesn't work out. I cannot have just vain hope that my project will finish and base my faith on that. So, lets pretend that my project won't work out. How do I define my faith. I know that my Father in Heaven loves me and he will always take care of me. I know that bad things can happen in the process and life can be pretty tough and miserable, while I am still thinking that he will take care of me.

In Alma 14 we learn that the men in the city of Ammonihah who believed the preaching of Alma and Amulek were cast out. That feels like a column 3. Then their families were burned to death. That feels like a column 3. But Alma tells us that the lord "receiveth them up unto himself, in glory". That sounds like a column 1 success, not failure.

So, I have to evaluate things from the Lord's timeline of eternity, not my timeline of so many days or weeks.

The second story I think of is the Martin-Willey Handcart company. They were following the Lord's command to go to the place the Saints were gathering, yet they ran into snow storms so sever that many died. Yet, in spite of that, they had faith in God, they were delivered by other Saints before they all died, and non of them ever doubted their faith in Christ or the church. So is it random when things will work out smoothly, like my house building project, and when it will work out disastrously and we will not be saved, or disastrously and we will be saved?

The people of Ammonihah were allowed to be martyrs to convict the wicked justifiably. If the wicked were that wicked in their heart, but never burned righteous people, it would be harder for justice to allow their condemnation since they never did the murderous act. So, it was allowed so they could show their hearts openly, and have a justified condemnation for it. That scenario doesn't seem to apply to any options of whether my project gets finish or not, so I'll skip to the next.

The Martin-Willey Handcart company were at Winter Quarters late in the year. I've heard someone once ask, "Couldn't the Lord have told them that there would be a bad storm, or couldn't he have prevented it from hitting their camp and freezing them to death?" Well, apparently he did. The Lord inspired their Stake President to tell them to stay there for the Winter and go on to the Salt Lake Valley in the Spring. But, the people were 'overzealous' and wanted to be with the rest of the Saints as soon as possible. So their Stake President said if they go, he will go with them as he was their Shepherd. If they would have followed the inspired instruction of their ecclesiastical leader, they would not have been stuck in a death-creating snow storm.

But, they didn't, and they were. Then the power of the story happens. In spite of the overzealous desires, the lack of patience, and the disobedience to their Stake President's instruction, the Lord still did deliver them in the end. In the end is the next key phrase. This principle is demonstrated again in the Book of Mormon.

The people of Zeniff were righteous. When his son Noah became King, they were wicked. Then they got into bondage by the Lamanites just like they were warned would happen if they did not repent (Mosiah 12:2, Mosiah 21:3-4,8,13). Then under Limhi, Noah's son, they repented enough, and got humble enough (Mosiah 21:14) that the Lord began to help them. This is a key point. Mosiah 21:15 says the "Lord was slow to hear their cry because of their iniquities" - we reap the consequences of our actions and must experience them so we can learn from them - "nevertheless the Lord did hear their cries, and began to soften the hearts of the Lamanites that they began to ease their burdens; yet the Lord did not see fit to deliver them out of bondage." At this point we are totally in the Lord's timeline, even though we have tried so hard to create a timeline of our own.

There is also the example of the people of Alma. They left the people of Noah so they could live righteously since they had repented (and Noah didn't like that). However, they also got into bondage with the Lamanites. Their outcome is different than the people of Limhi because they had repented before their bondage, rather than because of their bondage. They became strong enough to carry their burden with ease (Mosiah 24:12-15). They demonstrated their faith sufficiently that they were soon delivered from bondage (Mosiah 24:16).

So there are the outlines of my options for faith.

1. If the Lord has revealed to me to do a project, I can know that all obstacles will be overcome without hardship* because it is his plan, and I am following it.
(*There may be things that seem to hinder progress, but in this paradigm they are not seen as difficult, and hardly as hindrances, because the Lord has orchestrated all the details before hand, and I know that he has, so I only watch to see the solution of each new possible obstacle.)

2. If I have a project I want, and the Lord sanctions it, see number 1.

3. If I have a project that is not in line with the Lord's will (but not bad), or if I have not worked it according to his wishes, I can expect his help and deliverance, but that may not necessarily include the completion of my project as I planned it.

If I am operating in number 3, it is most important that I keep my eternal perspective, like the people in the city of Ammonihah who were martyred. It is OK if my project fails, or if it is excessively difficult to complete, because the most important point of anything is that I get my life in tune with the Lord's wisdom.

When I shift my focus from "how am I going to accomplish this?" to "however it works out, Heavenly Father, help me do things the way you want me to do them, help me faithfully endure the consequences of my poor actions, and help me be worthy of thy succor and deliverance" I find the peace of faith I am seeking. I know in the end, whether I reach my goal without deterrents, whether I must endure hardship before I am delivered, or whether I fail and have 'project martyrdom', the Lord is watching over me and guiding me in the way that will be for my eternal best experience. It is up to me to follow his guidance. (That is a major key point.)

My faith and prayers now shift from 'project completion' to letting go of 'my will' to "whatever happens (apparent good or bad), I will follow the Lord, I'll be humble, I'll repent; that way I know I will be in the hands of the Lord."