I've been thinking a lot about the following note in my scriptures attached to 1 Ne 17:2:
2 And so great were the blessings of the Lord upon us, that while we did live upon raw meat in the wilderness, our women did give plenty of suck for their children, and were strong, yea, even like unto the men; and they began to bear their journeyings without murmurings.
My note:
Obeying and Happy; This Study Overview
Nephi notes here when his family was obeying, happy, and being blessed.
Laman and Lemuel are in the same group. He says things indicating that they were happy just because things were easy: eating raw meat, bearing their burdens well.
Notes from Lindsay's conversation:
Mark Dayton said:
When we are in difficult situations and we find we are on our own more - meaning the Lord does not seem to be there helping us - when we have greater faith and trust in him, our sense of '"you abandonded me changes to a sense of you trust" me to do/decide/go through this on my own.
Also part of the same conversation with Lindsay: She was speaking with the Lord about people who doubt various forms of revelation. She said the Lord told there is a progression to their disbelief. He said they don't believe "because they can't, because they won't, because they don't."
That progression implies initially they are unable or incapable of believing.
When it changes to won't, it implies they have the opportunity to extend themselves to believe, or to do the things to be worthy of the gift of faith, but they are unwilling to do it and unwilling to extend themselves.
In consequence of that, they develop into the position where they are set in their decision of disbelief. It implies a willing decision to not believe, verses an incapability as in the first phase.
I can see that format in Laman and Lemuel. Initially they made statements like they were confused by their father's statements and prophecies. They couldn't understand. They progressed in their commitment to obedience and in their rebellion against it. Unlike the typical modern individual, they saw an angel, heard the voice of the Lord, and were (physically, electrically) shocked by Nephi through the power of God. All those experiences garnered their cooperation for a time. However, they didn't maintain that cooperative nature for very many years at a time. They were in the phase of 'won't'. It was possible for them to do the necessary things to believe and be given faith. That idea is demonstrated multiple times in 1st Nephi, this verse being one of them. Their inconsistency shows they were in the 'won't' phase.
The patterns and emotions that fueled their won't is what I am looking for in this study of the Book of Mormon. My initial suspect emotions are anger and fear. I am seeing the phrase 'hard hearted' as a description a lot. I can see jealously and pride being emotions that contribute.
In the end, Laman and Lemuel were well anchored into the 'don't' phase. Thus, they were cut off from the presence of the Lord and from the Lord's prophet and people.
1/2020
(New addition to the note in my scriptures)
I've been pondering this same progression this time around reading the story (2022). I remember back in 1998 and my first awareness of having faith instead of fear. I realized I didn't know what having faith was like because I had not been raised in a house where faith was spoken. Hurt, anger, complaining, worry were the things spoken of. Such as, "what are we going to do?" spoken with worry. It wasn't faith, such as, "We don't know what is going to happen, but we sincerely believe the Lord will help us."
As my faith progression has happened, and looking back right now in the framework of the phrase of "can't, won't, don't", I can see I was in the "can't" phase. I can see I chose a different path than Laman and Lemual chose. That has made my path end defferently than theirs.
Can't, Won't, Don't
changes to
Can't, Willing, Able.
I didn't understand faith initially.
I was willing to believe and have faith.
I am able to have firm faith.
Thinking of this progression:
can't
won't
don't
I realize that "can't" may not be that they are mentally or spiritually incapable, implying that they will never be able to do it. Such as, people can't breathe underwater without mechanical assistance. They will never be able to.
This "can't" is more in the sense that they have never been taught nor seen examples of "being able to." That is where Laman and Lemuel were when they said they didn't understand their father's words. In my 30s, I realized I was in that position. I had never seen daily life without complaining about others, whether they were your family, friends, or local church leaders in my ward. I "couldn't" because I had never seen it so I didn't even comprehend it existed. It was an eye-opening experience to realize faith was not what I was doing.
The next phase comes when we have knowledge revealed to us. We are taught and/or see examples of faith. This can be from people we know or from scriputres we read.
That brings us to our options of phase 2: "won't" or "willing." I am guessing there is a spirit component to it. Does it "click" in our brain, and then we can be willing. Is that "click" a willingness of our spirit? Or, if our spirit is unwilling, it will it not "click" in our brain? Which comes first? The willing spirit or the brain click?
This middle step is where our choice lies. We have already comprehended, in part at least, what we are being asked to do or believe, i.e. the subject of the "can't" portion of faith and/or obedience. We then choose to either be willing to try, or we choose to not try.
If we choose to not try, we are nurturing our disbelief and doubt. That will lead us to the adament position of "I do not believe." We are then in the "don't" phase.
When we choose to try, our comprehension of the concept of what we are being asked to do or believe is broadened and deepened. The breadth and depth of our definition of faith increases. This is what Alma talks about in his analogy of nourishing the seed and watching it grow. We gain understanding, so we know it is a good seed.
Alma 32:28
...it beginneth to enlighten my understanding...
In otherwords, our better understanding shows us that having faith in Christ is a good thing that will make us happier and improve our lives.
This portion of the cycle seems to take the greatest amout of work out of the 3 cycles. To be constantly evaluating our thouhts and decisions we make about believeing and being faithful (vs doubting and complaining) takes a lot of energy. What we don't see during that process is the strength we are developing. It just doesn't show up measurably right away.
The seed and tree analogy is good to demonstrate this. We can see it takes months or years for a young tree to grow enough to get its trunk to the size that the wind or weight of the fruit doesn't threaten the uprightness of the trunk. Hopefully that conveys to us the value of patience in our own growth. Since a bigger trunk and tree easily tolerate wind more easily, hopefully it conveys to us that it won't always take the same amount of mental work, reminding, and determination to get through what seems to be insurmountable wind storm opposition.
If we are "willing" to believe and keep working on that course, we will find someday that our trunk of faith has grown substantially. The small wind storms no longer bend and strain us. We don't even notice them unless we make a conscious decision to do so.
Because there are always bigger wind storms, we may only notice there are still storms. We don't notice our strength for the tiny storms is sufficient. If we don't consciously notice this, we may give way to the path of doubt, skepticism and impatience. That is like "not nourishing our tree" and letting it die. We will forget the impact of our past experiences when we knew the Lord had helped us. We will magnify our doubt of our own worthiness or capability. We will possibly return to the "can't" phase and choose to travel down the path of "won't" instead of "willing."
Even when we anchor ourselves in the "willing" phase, it is possible we may have larger wind storms come that can destroy us, pulling our roots out of the ground. But if we have nurtured our "willing" phase, by then we will know that if there is a wind storm big enough to overwhelm our roots and pull us out of the ground, the Lord will come and either protect us from the wind, cause it to turn another direction, or even to stop, just like he did on the sea of Gallalee. Mark 4:37-39
37 And there arose a great storm of wind, and the waves beat into the ship, so that it was now full.
38 And he was in the hinder part of the ship, asleep on a pillow: and they awake him, and say unto him, Master, carest thou not that we perish?
39 And he arose, and rebuked the wind, and said unto the sea, Peace, be still. And the wind ceased, and there was a great calm.
"Peace be still."
We have more examples of this in the Old Testament in 2 Kings 6:
14...and a great host: and they came by night, and compassed the city about.
15 And when the servant of the man of God was risen early, and gone forth, behold, an host compassed the city both with horses and chariots. And his servant said unto him, Alas, my master! how shall we do?
16 And he answered, Fear not: for they that be with us are more than they that be with them.
17 And Elisha prayed, and said, Lord, I pray thee, open his eyes, that he may see. And the Lord opened the eyes of the young man; and he saw: and, behold, the mountain was full of horses and chariots of fire round about Elisha.
In our modern church history we see this in the story of Zion's camp.
The camp marched cautiously on. Plagued by wagon problems, they were forced to stop for the night on a hill overlooking a fork in the Fishing River, still ten miles from the exiled Saints. As they pitched their tents, they heard the rumbling of horse hooves as five men rode into camp. The strangers brandished weapons and boasted that more than three hundred men were on their way to wipe the Saints out.
Alarm rippled through the Camp of Israel. Knowing they were outnumbered, Joseph posted guards around the area, certain an attack was imminent. One man begged him to strike the mob first.
“No,” Joseph said. “Stand still and see the salvation of God.”
Overhead the clouds looked heavy and gray. Twenty minutes later, hard rains tore through camp, driving the men from their tents as they scrambled to find better shelter. The banks of the Fishing River disappeared as the water rose and surged downstream. Wind whipped through the camp, blowing down trees and upending tents. Bright lightning streaked the sky.
Wilford Woodruff and others in the camp found a small church nearby and huddled inside while hail pelted the roof. After a moment, Joseph burst into the church, shaking the water from his hat and clothes. “Boys, there is some meaning to this,” he exclaimed. “God is in this storm!”
Unable to sleep, the Saints stretched out on the benches and sang hymns through the night. In the morning, they found their tents and gear soaked and scattered throughout camp, but nothing was damaged beyond repair and no attack had come.
The rivers remained swollen, cutting the camp off from their enemies on the opposite bank.
So, when we anchor ourselves in the "willing" phase, and face it with patience, endurance and steadfastness, we will transition into the last phase of "able." It may take a little reminding occasionally, but our basic attitude and paradigm will be as the angels told Abraham after they heard Sarah scoff at the prophecy she could conceive a child in her old age. Genesis 18:14 They said, "Is there anything too hard for the Lord?" The answer was,"No."
It will be as Nephi said in 1 Ne 17:50:
And I said unto them: If God had commanded me to do all things I could do them. If he should command me that I should say unto this water, be thou earth, it should be earth; and if I should say it, it would be done.
or as Jacob says in Jacob 4:6
...our faith becometh unshaken, insomuch that we truly can command in the name of Jesus and the very trees obey us, or the mountains, or the waves of the sea
I'm remembering my brother, John. I think it was before his mission. He introduced me to the concept of having one's calling and election made sure. Because of him, I made my goal in life to become worthy of that. I do not expect I will ever be important enough or prominent enough for the Lord to tell me that. I presume it is given to those who have key roles with large groups of people. That doesn't matter. My goal is to be worthy of it. I don't think I'll reach it; but I'll get closer if it is my goal than if I am unaware of it, or if I disregard it.
When in my 30s, as I mentioned, I had been able to shed some burdens of low self-esteem. That seemed to be the catalist for beginning to see and understand the concept of faith. I initially thought that improved self-esteem was necessary before one could begin to develop faith. But, I actually doubted that thought. I realized that if I had had faith, the process of improving my self -esteem would have been easier.
I couldn't see which needed to come first, faith or good self-esteem.
Because of the long-term results of the goal my brother presented to me, I have not only transissioned into having faith, but I have transmissioned into understanding I am as valid of a person as everyone else. Part of it came before I truely had faith, but the most thorough part came after I had faith.
I'm beginning to think they are disconnected. Whether they are or are not connected, my experience shows me that sequence is not essential to achieving either or both.
If I think hard enough, I could see how "can't, willing, able" can apply to recovering self-esteem. It probably applies to all the areas of growth we need to make.
